The world is a pretty amazing place...

New Blog

2008-07-22T18:13:00.001-07:00

www.philandlacy.blogspot.com

lovely...

What we've made convenient...

2008-07-15T08:41:00.001-07:00

I was thinking yesterday about human suffering and also what it means to be human. They say that the greatest and worst experiences of our lives are what really shape us into who we really are. Sometimes those experiences come hand in hand. But when I was thinking about human suffering, probably us white, middle-class folks have it the best. Our suffering consists of dying grandparents or the weight of finals week. This might sound a little heartless, but even the worst of our suffering (an alcoholic parent, physical or sexual abuse, etc.), doesn't seem to compare in my eyes with the suffering of the third world.

Conveniently, we have defined (WE as in the Western, developed world) human and what "real life" is to traveling, education, having people skills, and an occasional spiritual experience. If we can speak, if we are literate, if we have seen other parts of the world, if we have incurred on some magical "other" existence, if we have been to college, if we "know our stuff", then, and only then are we truly human. Right???

Well, I'm not thinking that's particularly true... And worst of all, it devalues the worth of the majority of all the other human beings on this beautiful planet. What if everything we thought was true was completely wrong? Like what if we have placed education on a pedestal so high that we are completely blind to "real life", that is if real life was only seen by the eyes of the suffering. We conveniently assume that if "they" don't have running water, or if they have AIDS, or if they've never been to school that they are less than human. When the reality is that in all the time we've spent going to the lake and playing scrabble, these people have been searching for food and praying for clean water.

I have never experienced the death of a parent, the lack of a parent, starvation, disease, genocide, ethnic cleansing, lack of education, homelessness, etc... I mean the list could go on and on. But I guarantee that if I had experienced any of those terrible things, I would have a much different picture of the world and what true life really is.

I don't know. All I'm saying is that we've made a very convenient definition of life and what it means to be human, that all we've done is spit in the faces of those whose lives look nothing like ours.

It's at least something to ponder...

Lacy

The Good Life

2008-06-29T15:20:00.000-07:00

Lots of people ask me "how's married life?", "how's it feel to be married?", "how are the newlyweds?"... Lots of people have asked me if I feel like a new or different person. Lots of people have asked me to pinpoint the biggest difference. First off, married life is great. I highly recommend it! I get to live with my best friend (sorry Erica), and there is nothing better than that! However, besides the few OBVIOUS differences, here are some things I've learned and encountered as a newlywed wife.

1.) For the first time in my life I am poor. This may sounds depressing, but it is teaching us a lot. We live in a tiny place. We have no air conditioning. We shop at Aldi's. We go to the laundromat. We play ladder golf instead of going to the movies. I'm sincerely glad we opted out of waiting till we had money to get married.

2.) Love and laughter really are food for the soul. There has not been a single day that has gone by that I haven't loved fully or laughed hard. When you live with someone as funny as Phil, it's hard not to crack up on a frequent basis. But, as one of my new favorite songs goes... "we got our love", and that is what will keep us alive.

3.) The "role" of a wife isn't so bad. I'm serious. I actually like to cook dinner every night. I like to make the house look nice for when Phil gets home from work. I like having to ask Phil to clean the toilet. :) I didn't know about the "role" and if it would fit me or not. Turns out, I'm quite the housewife, especially in my cute floweredy lime-green apron!

4.) Marriage makes you vulnerable. Living with someone 24/7, especially in the way of a spouse, you get a little exposed. Phil sees all my faults. He sees where I'm lazy, what I eat, what I do when no one's looking, how much time I spend with the Lord, etc. And when I'm upset or quiet or sad or whatever, I can't just keep it in. I have to tell him what's up. It's good for a marriage to be vulnerable. Really good.

5.) Sex is only a tiny part of the "becoming one". Becoming one is so much more! How he hangs his towels, where we leave our shoes, the way he likes to make cinnamon toast, how I like the pillows arranged, where we want to go for dinner.... I could go on and on, but I think you get the point. Up until about a month ago, Phil and I did a lot of things in completely different ways. But now that we're married, we see those differences and we find a sweet little middle where the oneness is created! It's beautiful. That's why in a few years from now, we'll have similar sayings, manerisms, heck - we'll probably even start to look alike!

So there ya go... A few things I have learned in the past month!

--Lace

Recent Trends: the GOOD and the BAD

2008-06-27T19:05:00.000-07:00

Phil and I frequently talk about the "trends" we see in the world, often in our own community here in Columbia. Trends are really funny things, some good, some awful, some sad, and some that hopefully evolve into ways of life. Let's name a few...

1.) Organic Food. - I haven't decided what I think about it. Sure, it's great because of preservatives and pesticides and what not. I have not been a participant of this trend because of money. Organic food costs too much.

2.) Smoking Cigarettes. - BAD trend. At first it was cigars and the hookah, but now I've heard that the trend is to smoke real cigarettes. This is probably the most surprising fact I've heard lately, and the saddest. With all we know about smoking and how bad it is for our health, it's really stupid that so many people have started it lately.

3.) Going Green. - great trend! Sad that it's a "trend", but at least more people know about it and are becoming more exposed to ways we can help our environment. I have tried a little bit with going green, but again... It's more expensive.

4.) Hummus. - so glad I found this trend. Ha! I love hummus. But don't eat it just because it's "in". Eat it because it's freaking good.

5.) Being "All About" Something. I can't name specifics because it would hurt feelings. But when people are all about a coffee shop, or a book club, or a church, or a group, or whatever, it seems stupid and takes away from the passion you should find within that certain thing. For instance. Instead of being obsessed with a church, be wildly passionate about the Jesus you love. Instead of being obsessed with a certain group, be wildly passionate about your life's mission. Instead of being all about a coffee shop or a book club, be wildly passionate about the relationships and experiences you gain from those things.

6.) "Fake" Specialty Diets. - We've all seen them. The people who tackle a silly diet to be weird or different or whatever. Kudos to those of you (Rachy-Rach!) who have real reasons for your diet and who actually stick with it instead of bailing. There are good reasons to go on specialty diets. But there are really stupid reasons too...

7.) Blogging. - I'm so sad this is a trend, and not a lifestyle. I am a dedicated blogger, and have been since middle school (yes, xanga counts!) It makes me sad when people blog for a few months and then stop. I love the blogging community. Reading ideas, thoughts, learning new music, stuff like that.

8.) American Apparel. - Sorry if this offends you. I just don't buy it. People aren't wearing these clothes for the better cause of AA, (it's a sweatshop free company in case you didn't know). The majority of the "fashion world" wears AA just because it's in. In most cases, (magazine ads, even the AA store on the plaza in KC) I have seen an American Apparel shirt with a $400 pair of jeans. Just doesn't make much sense.

9.) Christian Lingo. - I hate it. "pursue", "intentional", "exclusive relationship", "do life with". I know, I know.... I've said these words and phrases many times. But I feel like they have less meaning now. The words come out because they are the "things to say". I guess if they are meant, then they're not so bad. I just think they are overused.

10.) The Avoidance of the Word "Love". - Never was I a part of this trend. I've actually heard the phrase "we don't know how we feel, we can't trust our emotions" come out of someone's mouth. You can't say you love someone because you don't know what love is. You can't say I love you because if you break up, then your heart will ache worse than if you avoided saying it. Right??? Nope, wrong. If you love someone, you better tell them. And you won't question it when you do, you'll know right away that it's love. No matter what others are telling you. If Jesus, the guy we're all following, is all about love, then maybe we should be too.

I hope that these 10 little comments didn't hurt or offend anyone. That wasn't my intent. Just some things to think about. Especially you smokers! Stop that!!!

Adios,

Lace

dream jobs that probably wouldn't require a college degree...

2008-06-24T14:07:00.001-07:00

Often I have little dreams of things I could see myself doing. And lately, they have been pounding away at my mind. Most of them just sound like the most perfect job, something that would be fun and different everyday, yet none of them would require a college degree. Here's a small list, (in no specific order, of course):

1. Cupcake Bar - I'd love to start one of these in Columbia. I went to my first last weekend in STL. We'd have a cute name like "the sweetest thing" or something like that, and sell only cupcakes. Big ones, small ones, fruity ones, chocolate ones, maybe even a few VEGAN ones!

2. Wedding Anything - the more and more I think about my wedding day and how much I loved it, I think about planning weddings for others, or working at a gown shop or something. I think it would be a blast to help other girls plan their big day! And, I could show them how to have a gorgeous wedding with a small budget!

3. Cutting Hair - I know, I know, you're probably thinking this job doesn't sound glamourous at all. But I really do think it would be a fun job.

4. Florist - how fun would it be to put beautiful bouquets of flowers together all day? It would constantly smell good and you could always be creative!

(Yes, these are pictures of flowers from my wedding!)

Those are just a few....

Maybe I could do some of these part-time while I have kids, or in the summer when I'm a teacher... I dunno.

-Lace

Why I've got to be dedicated to loving on youth...

2008-06-18T09:47:00.000-07:00

Have you heard this new song? Phil and I heard it for the first time while we were honeymooning. At first I thought it was Lindsey Lohan after her big lesbian kick, turns out, it's another singer by the name of Katy Perry. Here are the astonishing lyrics. I added the italics to emphasize how heartbreaking this is.

This was never the way I planned
Not my intention
I got so brave, drink in hand
Lost my discretion
It's not what, I'm used to
Just wanna try you on
I'm curious for you
Caught my attention

I kissed a girl and I liked it
The taste of her cherry chap stick
I kissed a girl just to try it
I hope my boyfriend don't mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Don't mean I'm in love tonight
I kissed a girl and I liked it
I liked it

No, I don't even know your name
It doesn't matter
You're my experimental game
Just human nature
It's not what, good girls do
Not how they should behave
My head gets so confused
Hard to obey

Us girls we are so magical
Soft skin, red lips, so kissable
Hard to resist so touchable
Too good to deny it
Ain't no big deal, it's innocent

This song breaks my heart. How many 13-18 year-old girls are going to hear this and think it's okay to do this? It's innocent. It's just human nature. It's ok, try it out.

Watch the video:

KATY

-Lacy

Throw Up

2008-05-23T11:12:00.000-07:00

This morning, all I could think about was the wedding. I got so excited I literally thought I was going to throw up!

One week from today!!!

Lacy Donaldson

A final piece of writing...

2008-05-13T12:03:00.000-07:00

This is Love

By Lacy Donaldson

Nine.
Nine, nine, NINE!

Nine times I’ve been here and I still can’t stomach it. I don’t know if it’s the smell, the sounds, or the fact that I’ll never be in their situation. We talk all this talk about our purpose and about life to the full. I get it when it comes to me and my life,

But what about them?
What is their purpose?

The thought that they have to live this life so my eyes can see it,
makes me want to throw up.

You say that you are always working towards our good.
But it’s hard to see the good in this place.
It’s hard to let yourself see anything.

Men with tiny legs are lying on rusted roll-away beds. The mattresses have disappeared, leaving the men to relieve themselves through the creaky springs of those old beds. The drool swoops down, landing in their lap. I crouch down, patting them with my warm hands, thanking God they have shut their eyes, hiding them from my tears.

Sobbing, I can feel you.
You are right behind me, whispering…

This is love.
This is love.
This is love.

I remember the first time I ever visited this place. My eyes had been turned on to a world that only certain hearts are able to see. I made my way around the place, stopping here and there to pat a back, wipe a tear, and calm a shaking soul.

Something is weird here. So much heaven and so much hell. It pounds at your heart.
It just doesn’t seem right, you know? No one should have to live like this, no one…

Women are folded over, hunched and hurting. The smell of week-old urine reeks from under their beds. All of their belongings are safely tucked under their pillows, so no one will steal them in the night. I see feet that don’t look like feet, hands that don’t look like hands. And I still can’t seem to understand.

Who has deformed them?
Who has caused this infliction?

Here is what I want to know:
Why didn’t you pick me?
Why am I just seeing this in front of my eyes?
Why can’t I hurt for them?
Why am I not drooling all over myself and dying with no hope?

I can hear you, you answer me almost immediately.

My Daughter, can’t you understand?
This is love.
This is love.
This is love.

But I cannot. I just can’t grasp what your mind is thinking, what your heart is beating, what you are trying to teach me. I can’t seem to find any peace in my soul. Not here, not in this place. I’m wondering why you would allow this to happen. These are your people. These are hearts and minds that you created.

And then I hear you again, breathing inside of me, saying…

You are right, my darling. How can we allow this to happen? You are my body. You are my hands and my feet. Be my body. Be my hands and be my feet. Wrap yourself up in my skin and show these beloved ones a love that they have never imagined. Touch the insides of their souls with your hands. Coax their hearts to see a better day.
Be my body. Be my hands and be my feet.

I return to the women in the corner, my eyes still filled with tears. Without reluctance, I touch them. I hold their hands and look deep into their beautiful eyes. I sing with them and cry with them. I have them tell me their stories, where they have been and what has led them to this place. Listening to the voices of brokenness, I nod and say to myself…

This is love.
This is love.
This is love.

Best little date night...

2008-05-10T18:17:00.000-07:00

Last night Phil and I went on the best little date! Parks & Rec is doing this cool thing, that every 2nd Friday night, now till September, they're showing a movie at Stephen's Park! They have this HUGE blow-up big screen thing. We took a blanket and watched Bee Movie under the stars! It was so much fun! And only $3 a person! Another fun thing to do in Columbia this summer!!!

If you haven't seen Bee Movie, I recommend it!!! Hilarious!

Love,
Lace

Things to do in Columbia during the summer...

2008-05-08T08:38:00.000-07:00

The myth is that summer in Columbia is super lame. 27,000 people leave the city, leaving it boring, hot, and miserable. However, I'm pretty sure that is a myth.

Since Phil and I will be living here this summer, I have been researching things to do, and here are a few things I've found so far:

The Twilight Festival

Every Thursday in June and September, from 6-9, the downtown area is blocked off. There is live music, carriage rides, activities for kids, and all of the shops and restaurants are open late!

9th Street Summerfest

Every Wednesday night, May through October, there is a HUGE block party on 9th street in front of the Blue Note. Every week there is a band, food, and beer. Best of all - everything is free! Death Cab is starting off Summerfest this year, with a Saturday performance on May 31st (the day after my wedding!)

Swimming Pools and Lake Beaches

Columbia has over 7 different aquatic facilities, all for the public to use! Almost all of them are outside! There are 3 lakes with a swim beach, and city pools with slides and fun stuff like that! Can't wait to check these out!

So that's just a few of the sweet things going on in Columbia this summer! I'm pretty excited!!!

--Lace

Learn something new everyday...

2008-04-30T23:48:00.000-07:00

Today in my TDP class, (yes, even the one where I hardly learn anything), a group presented on deaf children in the regular classroom. I learned something I thought would be useful to all of you:

Never call a deaf person "Hearing Impaired". This is NOT PC, and is extremely offensive, as if they are broken. Always refer to them as "deaf" or "hard of hearing"...

Pass it along...

Lace

p.s. 1 month from today! But who's counting?? :)

April Showers Bring May Flowers!

2008-04-28T11:14:00.000-07:00

The life of a bride is crazy. All wedding, all the time. But, this weekend was a blast! I had two wonderful showers, and just wanted to thank everyone for making them so great! Here are some pictures from the weekend...

Counting down the days...

Lace

Summer Reading Project

2008-04-23T12:15:00.000-07:00

So one of my major goals for the summer is to read a bunch of books that I actually want to read, and that aren't required of me as a student. One of the worst things about being an English major is the fact that there is never enough time to read something for leisure, much less read what's required.

Book #1: The Emergent Manifesto

Really excited to start reading this. It's basically the beliefs of the emergent church, written by a ton of people including Brian McClaren, Tim Keel (pastor at Jacob's Well).

More to come...

Lace

Today I was verbally raped and murdered...

2008-04-22T15:45:00.000-07:00

There's nothing like it in the whole world.

I walked into the discount grocery store, hoping to find some cheap produce, but found so much more. As I walked down the meat aisle, I felt 2 grown men following me. I could hear them whispering and what not.

Finally, I heard the, "hey baby, hey baby!" "hey blondie!" "you there in the shirt," "how bout you suck my dick."

Really nice. I swallowed by humanity and began walking away, again ingoring a terrible insult from a man who saw me as an object.

This has only happened to me in my life maybe 10 times, and all since I was about 17. And every single time, I swallow, say nothing, and walk away. I wish I had the guts to say something back, but every single time this happens, the words are too peircing to say anything. I realized today that the only thing worse than this is being raped or murdered.

Sorry for the let down.

MY CD IS OUT!!!

2008-04-15T23:17:00.000-07:00

Yep, I have exciting news: My cd's have arrived! I am completely excited about them. They turned out great! If you pre-ordered a copy, make sure I get it to you soon! If you want one, let me know!

A goal of mine for a good two years now has finally been complete!

Thanks to everyone who helped out and made this possible for me as well! I love you all so much!

-Lacy Adair :)

The Best Book...

2008-04-11T11:20:00.000-07:00

This is most definitely my favorite book. It's called Love Poems from God. Phil got it for me for my 20th birthday. Basically it has all these poems in it by people like Rumi, St. Francis of Assisi, Hafiz, St. Thomas, etc. And Daniel Ladinsky translated it all and put it together in this book. He has lots of other books out too: The Gift, I Heard God Laughing, The Subject Tonight is Love... and of course they are all fabulous as well...

Here's one of my favorites:

A Lover Who Wants His Lovers Near

He is

sweet that way,

coaxing the world to dance.

Look how the wind holds the trees in its hands

helping them to

sway.

Look how the sky takes the fields and the oceans

and our bodies in its arms, and moves

all being toward

His lips.

God must get hungry for us; why is He not also

a loves who wants His lovers

near?

Beauty

is my teacher

helping me to know He

cares for

me.

Welp, you should own that book...

Happy Friday!

Love,

Lace

Did you know???

2008-04-01T16:00:00.000-07:00

I found out an interesting little fact over the weekend:

The reason we say "God Bless You" to someone after they sneeze, is because a long time ago, people thought that a sneeze was demonic! So if "God blesses you", the demon will leave your body!!!

Pretty interesting!!!

...Lace

Something good...

2008-03-29T08:14:00.000-07:00

Psalm 23

The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.

He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
he restores my soul.

He guides me in paths of righteousness
for his name's sake.

Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;

your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.

You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.

You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.

Surely goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.

So good...

My goals for Spring Break:

2008-03-20T15:05:00.000-07:00

Spring break is this coming week. Phil is backpacking Utah. Haley will be in Jamaica. Mary Kate is going to New York City. My young life girls are going to Myrtle Beach. But, since I have a very important big day coming up in just a couple months, I have to stay home and get things accomplished. However, aside from all the wedding stuff I've got to get done, I have a list of things I'd like to do for myself, to get a little break from this thing I've been calling life... (aka the life-sucking semester of 19+ hours of school, working 20 hours a week, leading young life, and planning a wedding and a marriage. Yep, that is my life!)

Finish The Bell Jar - I started this book last Thanksgiving break. How pathetic is that?
Spend an afternoon in the Plaza Barnes and Noble, drinking some coffee, looking out the second-story windows, and reading some magazines!
See a $ movie a day! There's a dollar theater close to my house. They show month-old movies for only $2!
Play with my weiner. Haha - sounds gross but I have a weiner dog, Elmo, who is getting old and frail and needs some puppy play time.
Sleep in every single day. This is a hard one for me. Even when I try, I can't manage to sleep past 9. But it would be glorious if I could sleep in till about noon everyday.
Go running with my bff. If it's nice, it's lovely to go running with Lauren around the square.
Cavity filled! Yep, my second cavity of my entire life. I've got to get it filled sometime this week.
Wedding invitations in the mail - doesn't sound very exciting but it's got to be done!
Eat about a pound of peeps.

Happy 1st day of Spring!

Lace

Happy Birthday, to the one I love!

2008-03-18T00:02:00.000-07:00

This is the face of Phil Stroessner, 22 years old today. Isn't this picture catalogue-worthy?! What a good lookin' man. Anyway, I just wanted to wish him a very happy birthday! I love you so much babe!

-Lace

b-day surprise

2008-03-17T11:03:00.000-07:00

For Phil's birthday (which isn't till tomorrow), we took a surprise trip to the lou on Saturday. It was such a fun trip! Highlights:

The St. Louis St. Patrick's Day Parade, where we saw many amazing things, including a few dyed dogs like this one! Horrible but hilarious...

A tour of the Budweiser Brewery - which was INCREDIBLE! We got to see these clydesdales - where Marta made the comment about someone shooting them throught the fence with a shot gun.

A trip to Dewey's Pizza in Kirkwood, where my little, 2-month-old baby neice Cora showed up to play with me!

And our last stop was Skyzone in Chesterfield, where we jumped and jumped on trampolines for an hour. Exhausting, but very fun!

We had a blast!!!

The distortions of charity...

2008-03-13T13:30:00.000-07:00

How pretty is this girl?

Pretty ridiculous.

Let me tell you why...

On Ebay earlier this week, Scarlett was selling a date with herself. A man could bid in the auction to take her out to her next movie preview, all the money going to charity. The date with Scarlett sold for over $40,000! And how sweet, all 40K of someone else's money goes to Oxfam while millionaire Johansson took all the credit.

A couple funny facts:

Scarlett Johansson is only 22 years old, and the 6th richest celebrity under 30 years old.
What does Scarlett Johansson look for in a guy? Well, People Magazine asked her. Her reply... "I only date guys with a net worth of over $40 million dollars who work out all day and treat me like a princess..."

Just some food for thought...

Welcome to the club!

2008-03-13T07:08:00.000-07:00

Just wanted to say congrats to this beautiful couple! Ryan and Danielle have joined us in the quest towards marriage! I could not be more excited for them! What a beautiful, BEAUTIFUL thing!

One Love,

Lace

good movie

2008-03-12T15:18:00.000-07:00

hey this movie is great. check it out. cool cinematography and narration. i haven't read the book, but need to soon. spring break maybe?

ok sweet...

Columbia's newest phenomenon!

2008-03-05T22:45:00.000-08:00

EVERYONE CLICK HERE!!!

The Jamaican Jerk Hut (used to be a trailer that moved around from Jeff City to Columbia) is not located inside Mojo's Cafe! They serve all of my favorite Jamaican dishes, including the best secret known to the island, the Juicy Pattie! (Once described last summer as spicy beef wrapped in a cheez-it!) See picture below:

The Jamaican Jerk Hut also serves Ting, my favorite Jamaican soft drink! I can tell this place is going to be a new and frequent favorite!!!

One Love,

Lace

What I am learning in class...

2008-02-28T14:10:00.000-08:00

Marta always has these really cool, almost-weekly posts about what she is learning in all of her classes, so here goes:

History of English Language: I'm learning about 5 new languages. Transcribing Old English, Proto Germanic, stuff like that into IPA (International Phonetic Alphabet) and MDE (Modern Day English). It's ridiculously hard. For instance... scinan [šinan], rune [runə], wealh [wæǝlx]

Africana Womanism: The 18 characteristics of an Africana Womanist! Including: male compatability, strong, nurturering, flexible role-playing, etc...

20th Century British Literature: That Zadie Smith is very creative. And all about eugenics, the Islam faith, and that the kid next to me thinks the homeless should be used for medical testing instead of mice.

Critical Theory: Jacques Lacan is crazy, and I don't understand him.

Teaching Language Arts: the importance of teaching grammar, how using blogs is now becoming a very practical and successful way to get students interested in writing, and pondering how music effects student writing. All very interesting stuff!

Behavior Management: not a darn thing...

Literary Synthesis (my field): that even though The Color Purple is a very wonderful novel to read, the students in my class still choose not to participate.

....Lace

Snow Day Memory

2008-02-22T08:37:00.000-08:00

Today is another snow day! Which means I'm working from home today instead of trudging through the snow all the way to JC. Unfortunately though, Mizzou still has class today. They have only canceled class like 4 times EVER for snow, one of which was last year. Here's a funny picture of that snow day:

How funny is this picture?! I'm not even sure what is going on. I think Phil and Erica tackled me, but I'm not sure. It makes me laugh...

Welp, happy snow day! Let's go sledding tonight!

Love,

Lacy

Best dream I've ever had...

2008-02-19T08:49:00.000-08:00

I woke up this morning after the COOLEST dream I've had in my life. No, I'm not making this up. Though, it is almost that hard to believe! I had a dream that my family and I took a trip out to the country to see my brother and his wife and baby. (I guess they had moved out to a country house or something.) After being there for a while, I decided to go out and explore the area around where they lived. I'm not sure what happened next, (you know how dreams are) but the next thing I know I am wandering around Beyonce's House! Yes, Beyonce and her family lived in the country in a really neat old country house. I was expecting to see really ritzy things, as I'm sure Beyonce is loaded, but that's not what I found at all. Beyonce's house was decorated in old-fashioned country stuff. Just cute, nothing to special, or expensive, or even sexy-ish. (I figured Beyonce's house would be like one of those houses on MTV Cribs - you know, like a lip-shaped couch, and big murals of her face everywhere...) Anyway, I walked upstairs and found Beyonce's room. A big room with white walls, a big bed, with a turquoise quilt, and that was really about it. Beyonce came in to the room and we introduced ourselves. I told her how much I loved her and how much I had been wanting to meet her. I then told her about how impressed I was with her house and how glad I was she didn't flaunt her money around like crazy. Again, I'm not sure what happened next, but my dream ended with Beyonce and I sitting on her bed, hugging each other really tight, and both of us crying - tears running down our faces and everything... It was incredible and I really kind of feel like I really did meet Beyonce!

Incredible!

-Lace

Great new album...

2008-02-15T10:24:00.000-08:00

I got this album as a Valentine's Day present. It's terrific. John Legend, Live from Philadelphia, 19 tracks! Check it out!

My favorite tracks:

02-Heaven
07-Save Room
08-Where is the Love (featuring Corinne Bailey Rae)
11-Slow Dance
14-PDS (Feel Like Makin' Love Medley)
16-Ordinary People

It's good...
-Lace

Happy Love Day!

2008-02-14T14:17:00.000-08:00

Wishing everyone a wonderful day! It couldn't be anymore beautiful outside! Love on somebody today! I found this cute little print at Etsy!

Here are some really sweet lyrics to a song that Phil and I are going to have in our wedding, by an Irish band, The Pogues! Enjoy...

I just want to see you

When youre all alone

I just want to catch you if I can

I just want to be there

When the morning light explodes

On your face it radiates

I cant escape

I love you till the end

I just want to tell you nothing

You dont want to hear

All I want is for you to say

Why dont you just take me

Where Ive never been before

I know you want to hear me

Catch my breath

I love you till the end

I just want to be there

When were caught in the rain

I just want to see you laugh not cry

I just want to feel you

When the night puts on its cloak

Im lost for words dont tell me

All I can say

I love you till the end

Love you...
Lace

homeless around the city

2008-02-12T16:05:00.000-08:00

I've been doing lots of research and looking into things around the city of columbia. Found out some interesting facts:

families make up 1/3 of people staying in Missouri homeless shelters
homeless children are nine times more likely to repeat a grade and four times more likely to drop out of school
children make up the largest percentage of people living in poverty
there are only 3 homeless shelters in Columbia
Columbia police kick the homeless out of downtown from early morning till 7 or 8 at night

Check out these websites:

http://homeless.com/do/Home
http://www.blog.grassroots.org/

--Lace

If you haven't seen this...

2008-02-11T22:05:00.000-08:00

In case you didn't know, I happen to know the epitimy of a talented and sexy woman. My love for Beyonce has been going on for several years. Tonight, I get to share that love with my roommates. We're watching this: the greatest performance you've ever seen, the Beyonce LIVE Experience DVD!

Amazed,

Lacy

A prayer for relief...

2008-02-07T14:25:00.000-08:00

What is much harder to experience than personal heartbreak is the heartbreak of the person you love. When you are in a situation that has no happy ending or hurts a friend no matter what, your heart cries and breaks in half. I have seen this and watched this and seen a man falling to knees begging for mercy. And I am asking for that. I am asking for mercy. I have been praying for relief. For God to let up the rain. What always makes more sense to me is to love. Love unconditional. We are taught that. I have been given that. And so we are to live it out. I remember one night in Jamaica last summer when the reality of our broken world peirced through my heart. I was angry. I was alone. I was helpless. And all I wanted was a bit of relief, for someone to tell me that everything would be alright. About an hour later Phil came out and I told him everything on my heart. I told him what I wanted him to say. And he turned my face toward him, grabbed my arms, and said, "Lace, everything's not gonna be ok. But I will be here through it all." And although those words may sound trite, they are living proof of God's living reality in our lives right now. Whether we are befriending the homeless in Jamaica or the homeless in Columbia, there's no way to fight it out except through love. It will not be alright. The rain will keep pounding down. But the very best fight to fight is LOVE...

"The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit." Psalm 34:18 - I need to believe this right now...

One Love,

Lacy

connections...

2008-01-22T22:37:00.000-08:00

Today was the first day of classes. I'm enrolled in a class called Studies in Critical Theory. My teacher was a little nuts. She's this old crazy professor with blonde hair and red lipstick. She referred to herself as a "tenured radical". (I thought that was actually pretty hilarious and quite true!) Anyway, she gave an "introduction" to the course, which was more like a graduate lecture that passed over everyone's head. During the semester, we are going to look at the views of one man, a french "thinker" named J. Lacan. We're reading his black-market seminar called Le Desir et Son Interpretation, aka Desire and its Interpretation. This will be a very interesting semester, as we read his unpublished, and unofficially translated seminar - a 600-page bound book that a bunch of jesuits copied down while Lacan was giving the lecture in 1958. Anyway, why I'm telling you this is because she talked a lot about what Lacan thinks and believes and psychoanalyzes and all of that. Apparently he is considered to be the top thinker of the 20th century! His views counter Freud's in many ways. Our professor kept rattling off names and places and terms and stuff about post-structuralism and fundamentalism, and all these ism's we pretend to know about. And then she said what really caught my attention. Lacan (by the way, it's pronounced La-Khan, with one of those French, nasally 'n's) says that at the foundation of all things, there is loss, there is lack. We weren't born fulfilled, to live life in hopes to bring back our first being. Rather, we begin with loss, we begin broken. Because this guy is so into human thinking and ideas and philosophy and psychology, I'm guessing he doesn't have a solid belief in religion or spirituality (granted, I'm sure he has plenty of thoughts about many "ideas" in these topics.) Anyway, it struck me. It really did. Lacan believes that a baby doesn't know right from wrong or good from bad, until a trauma occurs. (Which I sort of think contradicts what I said he believed previously.) A baby doesn't know his mother's breast is good until it is taken away, and from then on, there is a loss, there is a brokenness, there is a quest for fullfillment, also known as LIFE! This was incredibly interesting to me, as I believe this to be our reason for life, a desire to be fulfilled or completed by Christ. Lacan believes that our human experience is only regulated by language, identifications, and trauma. (Which yes, this would be hard to disagree with. Although, I might add those seriously life-giving moments, the polar opposites of trauma!) All of these unconscious things we do are simply (or rather complexly) our own cultures imprinting on our human nature. My teacher just went on and on about how our entire lives revolve around the quest of being fulfilled. We need a cup of coffee because we lack a cup of coffee. We need a lover because we lack being loved by another. We are and have been at a loss since we begun. I don't know if this blows your mind like it did mine. But here is this deep thinker, one of the "top thinkers of the 20th century" who is experiencing what God designated our lives for. (And he probably doesn't even know it.)

This will be an interesting class-
Lace

A Call from Jay...

2008-01-17T09:57:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, my best friend from Jamaica called me, miss Jay! It was so great to hear her voice. I'm pretty sure God had something to do with it, because I was on a stretch of road that I never have phone service on, and we talked for a good 30 minutes. Anyway, we talked for a long time. She got my letter. Mizzou is down in Harmons now, so a friend took a bunch of letters down there for me! We talked about everything going on in Harmons. Donna had her baby boy. Ricky is out of prison and back with his family! All the workers want a raise. Donna is bound and determined to get her job back in the store. Alti still works for the water company. Matilda is still fabulous. Mark and Emily are doing well. Shane is Jay's new bodyguard. I mean, it was just great to hear from her. I got updated on ALL KINDS of stuff going on down there. Probably the most exciting news to me is that Jay is going to try and come to the states for our wedding! I freaked out when she told me! If we send an invitation to her soon, she can take it to the embassy to get a visa to come. We didn't really talk about money, but I know a plane tickets is around $700. Gosh, it would be incredible if she came! Pray hard that she'll be able to come and have the money to do it! If she is able to make it, she WILL be standing up with me. Yup, an 8th bridesmaid!!! I love that girl, and miss her to death...

One love,

Lace

my life is changed...

2008-01-10T23:03:00.000-08:00

Yesterday my brother and his beautiful wife gave birth to their very first baby girl, miss Cora Adair. We spent the day at the hospital, waiting to hear the good news of how long she was, if she had hair or not, what kind of ear lobes she had, and how much she weighed. Just a few hours after seeing Kate with her big belly and that belly button sticking out, she (along with the rest of us) had witnessed a miracle.

Cora Adair had come into the world with a head full of hair, blue eyes, her daddy's ears, her momma's nose, a smile on her face, and her Aunt's middle name! Never in my life have I witnessed something so beautiful. I'm serious, it was incredible. Watching my brother's face as he held her in her arms. Watching the way Kate seemed so at peace and in love with her new baby. I've never seen anything so miraculous. Everything was so perfect and meant to be. Even the doctor said she was perfect!

I got to spend the day in the hospital again today and I held Cora for hours and hours (so it seemed.) It was incredible. She slept most the time, wrapped up tight in her little blanket. I couldn't take my eyes off of her. I can't wait to see who she becomes. I can't wait to hear her laugh, or see what makes her eyes light up. Will she be a dancer? A 6-ft. basketball player? Will she follow her daddy's footsteps and become an incredible musician? Gosh, it's so incredible.

I am so blessed to be the Aunt of such a beautiful little girl. There is nothing like it in the whole entire world...

love,

lace

If the shoe fits, wear it and give another pair to someone else!

2008-01-08T11:24:00.000-08:00

I just wanted to share my favorite Christmas present with you. (Maybe a great gift idea for you in the future!) This wonderful pair of shoes: These are a pair of Tom's Shoes, which were given to me by my brother and his wife. Every time someone purchases a pair of Tom's Shoes, another pair, identical to the ones purchased, are given to someone in a 3rd-world country who walks the ground barefoot. It's such a neat idea and a great cause! Last night I was talking with Phil about how sad it is that almost every organization or project or whatever that involves giving always has an incentive attached. We heard an ad on the radio about a place that gives free carwashes on Tuesday's, while collecting a donation for a children's hospital. It's sad that we have to give things away to get people to give to things that we should already be giving to. Although that may be true, these shoes aren't just a way to get people to give. They are a constant reminder on my feet of the blessings I have, the God I serve, and the Love that He has given me to share with others. Check out Tom's website (below), they have a bunch of other sweet stuff as well!

http://www.blogger.com/www.tomsshoes.com

One Love,

Lace

Letter from Matilda

2007-11-19T08:51:00.000-08:00

Harmons Dist.
Harmons P.O
8/11/007 (Nov. 8, 07)

Dear Lacy,

Greetings in Jesus Name. I have recieve your letter and was so glad to hear from you and I am feeling very happy to hear the good news that you and Phil is going to get married. I am so sorry that I can't be there. The Lord say married is Honorable and thats is a good thing you are going to do. I wish you and phil a happy and prosperous married life. My dear friend I miss you very much hoping to see you both in Summer. We have plenty rain out here otherwise everything is O.K. I am very glad to know you are still going to school. It is very hard but God will see you through. I am still keeping close to God for He is my only Source of Survival in everything. When I remember How we always sit down and talk together I cry. I am still praying for you and Phil that God will help you Both in all your undertakings. Give my love to your family. My family join in sending best wishes to you and Phil and they wish you and a Happy and Beautiful marriage. I wish you Gods richest Blessing and protection. Keep sweet, you are my Darling Friend. I love you from the depth of my heart. Your darling friend, (I will write you and mail it.)

Matilda Morrant

Broken Down - a level of heartache I don't know how to dig myself out of...

2007-11-12T23:16:00.000-08:00

Life has been rough lately. I've built up this bitterness, this sweet tasting clod of shit that eases my aching heart for awhile, while it rips others to pieces. My ungracefulness could cause me to throw up. It's really easy to point out other's brokenness, selfishness, and sin. But why? Why have I allowed myself to become so swallowed up by this disease?

Heartache. Pure and simple. I have this heart, and it flourishes best when it is at home. And it hasn't been home for a long time. Where is home? Home is in people, in love, in relationships, in the lost, the broken, the homeless. And no, these aren't figurative words. I mean that my heart flourishes when I am with broken people. My heart comes alive when I am spending time with people who live on the streets. My heart sings so freaking loud when I am doing what Christ has allowed me to do.

I burst into tears tonight. A group of doctors and nurses just got back from Harmons. I got a facebook message saying that I had a letter from Matilda! Oh my LORD I cannot wait to open that letter! And then I opened up this photo album of the medical trip that just got back, and memories, and heartache, and sadness, and jealously, and love, and sweat, and passion filled my soul. I burst out crying and couldn't stop looking at these pictures of my home. This place that I spent 3 long months, loving on people and experiencing more of Christ living in me than I ever have before.

God, it kills me knowing that I won't be back to Harmons for so long. Maybe (pray!) I'll go back to Jamaica this summer, but only the Lord knows when. And what kills me even more is knowing so many people who get to go down over Christmas and Spring break. I don't want people going there for their own experience or to do the "Christian thing" or to have the "mission trip experience." I want people to go and love those people. Not with a goal, or an outcome, or an agenda, or any other selfish, faithless thing. Love and let God happen. Build a house. 1 house for 1 family in 1 week. That's incredible. Bring a family some new clothes. That's incredible. Listen to a story. Incredible. Pay attention to a life. Incredible. LET GOD LOVE THROUGH YOU.

I sit here in Lakota Coffee Company, crying. Trying to write a post for others to read, when really, it's just for me. It's time to deal with heartache. It's time to think about these things, and not to just sit with a heart full of memories that only few know about. It's time to write letters, to pray, to seek the Lord. It's time to start picking off this creeping bitterness and to allow myself to be at home again.

This is probably the most vulnerable you'll ever see me get.

Lace

video of me singing ...

2007-10-02T11:17:00.000-07:00

CLICK This!

man, I sure do love to sing...

2007-09-30T10:10:00.000-07:00

Hey I just wanted to say thanks to everyone who came out to my first show last night! It means a lot that you all were there. The night was everything it could have been. I was so nervous about an hour and a half before, but as soon as I got behind the mic, I was having a blast. It's incredible to see a dream finally coming true.

My first album will be out in early December! I did all my recording in the studio this past year and it is all being mixed and put together right now! If you'd like to pre-order a cd, that would be awesome! They are $10 and you'll be the first to get your hands on a copy. I need 100 people tp pre-order before I can get the cd made so make sure you get one!!!

Love you guys,

Lace

missing jamrock...

2007-09-28T09:39:00.000-07:00

Lately, I have really been missing Jamaica. Every morning when I wake up, I try to imagine myself waking up there. Hot as ever, roosters crowing, dogs barking like crazy, noise from downstairs... Last night Phil and I were driving home from Jeff City and a Jamaican-ish song came on the radio and all I could think about was dancing like crazy at courtyard. Little kids hanging on my arms, sweat dripping down my back, ice cream melted on the floor...

Gosh, I miss it a lot. I'm really hoping to go down over Christmas break. I only need $600, but now that we're saving for a wedding and a honeymoon and everything, I don't know if I'll be able to.

Lace--

Gettin' hitched...

2007-09-25T22:13:00.000-07:00

Well most of you know this, but I am engaged to PHIL!!! He propsed last Thursday. I would love to call all of you but it would take forever so I thought I would tell you all what happened here...

So last week, Phil asked me to go on the "BEST DATE OF MY LIFE!" So I knew we were going on a date last night. He picked my up at my door at 7:00 and we walked outside. I didn't see his car anywhere but I DID see a guy standing with his arms folded against this shiny black car. He was wearing all black, a bright orange tie, and had stunna-shades on! Low and behold, it was our chauffer for the night - ONE OF PHIL'S YOUNG LIFE GUYS!!! I got in the car and was like, "Phil, what is going on??? What are we doing? Why is Chad driving us around?" He just told me it was a special date...

We drove around downtown a little and then drove back towards East Campus (where we all live). We stopped at Phil's house. As soon as we parked, 2 guys dressed up came and escorted us to the balcony of Phil's apartment. (Yes, the guys were 2 more of Phil's YL guys...) We went up there and there was a cute little table for 2, lime green dishes, bright pink daisies in a vase... It was just CUTE! We had water and rolls and salad. (All of which were served to us by the "waiters" aka young life guys). After salad, Phil asked me if I was ready to go and I was like, "What? Ok, we just had salad though..."

We get back into our chauffeured car and drive around downtown some more, then head back again to East Campus and wind up at my best friend Erica's house. Same thing - 2 different Young Life guys come out to the car and escort us up the side steps and to the balcony at Erica's house. There was another table for 2 out there, but much fancier and more romantic. There were candles everywhere, a bottle of wine, Christmas lights all around the room, it was unbelievable... (and yes, by this time, I was thinking, "Ok this is either one incredible date or this is THE date!!!") We were served again and had a wonderful chicken with tomato basil pasta dish! It was incredible. After eating, Phil said it was time to go again...

Chad picked us up again and drove around downtown one last time and then we drove back to East Campus AGAIN and wound up at MY HOUSE!!! (Keep in mind, I had just been there about an hour before this!!!) Chad said this was the end of his job so we told him goodbye! The house looked amazing! It was beautiful!!! There were candles all the way up the front steps and we went inside to a dark dark house, all filled with candles and stuff. We walked through the kitchen and then were met by 2 more of Phil's young life guys who were all dressed up, holding up a dessert menu. They sat us on the back deck, which looked INCREDIBLE! Candles EVERYWHERE!!! More wine, rose petals covering the table, red table clothes, it was unbelievable. Our servers brought us out these incredible strawberry cannoli parfait things! Unbelievable! And chocolate covered strawberries! We just sat and talked... (By this time, it was dark outside...) After dessert, the servers brought us coffee to finish off our meal!

We were finished so Phil asked me if I wanted to go on a drive! I said sure! I asked him if we could go out to the river (We have this little spot on the Missouri River that we ALWAYS go to, like once or twice a week!) Since we didn't have his car, we had to walk to his house (which is just 2 blocks away.) So, we got in his car and headed towards the river... (About at 15-20 minute drive.)

We get there and he asks me if I want to get out! I say yes (which, I keep thinking, what if I WOULDN'T have!?) It's really really dark by this point so we get a flashlight and walk onto the bridge. We look down on the bank which is where we wanted to walk to, but we see 3 guys fishing and stuff. I asked Phil if he wanted to stay and he said, "Yeah, let's stay a little bit longer. Maybe they'll leave soon." Low and behold, 3 minutes later (no kidding) they packed up and left. So, we walked under the bridge and down to the bank.

The bank at night is AMAZING! On the bridge everything was covered by trees and really dark. But on the bank, it was incredible! It was much farther out, so the trees cleared out and you could see the sky! The moon lit the water up and lit the sky up! It was awesome looking. At this point I am being my normal nerdy self and looking around with the flashlight at stuff.

Then, Phil says, "Ah! I've got a bug bite! Ah!" (He bends down to "itch his bugbite.") Then he says, "Lace?" And I said, "Huh?" (Still kinda looking away at stuff...) "Will you marry me?" ...........

I looked down at him and (yes this is all a blur sort of right now. All I know is that I screamed "YES" and kept saying, "Oh my gosh! Oh my gosh!" "We're getting married!!!" Haha! And yes, there were tears, the happiest tears of my life!

So then he shows me the ring... A long time ago we decided we weren't going to do diamonds or anything too fancy. We want to do mission work in the 3rd world or in a poor inner-city somewhere, so we want to be very careful about what we have (possession-wise). I mean, how would it look if we lived in a poor slum in Africa or something and I had a huge rock on my hand? Not good. So he tells me about my ring...

It's my wedding band. Not an engagement ring. But right now, it's on a necklace. And I have to wear it as a necklace until we are officially wed! It is silver and has Hebrew writing all around it that means, "I am my lover's and He is mine." Yes - this is our favorite verse from Song of Solomon. So that's the ring story. Pretty great. Very different from the "normal" way of doing things, but a true testament to our love and our faith in glorifying Christ.

So then we leave... smiling from ear to ear. I can't believe it. I freaked out about every 2 minutes or so and it was just really great. I called my mom and dad. It was so great! They both cried and were really excited for us! Then, we're driving back to Phil's house. We said we were just going to hang out, watch a movie, and celebrate with each other.

We get to his house and it's pitch black. (Which is pretty odd for his house too!) We go inside, turn on the lights, and no joke, about 80 of our friends jumped out and screamed "Congratulations!!!!" It was amazing. I was screaming! I was SO surprised! I still can't believe it. I was shaking and crying and it was just incredible! We had a huge celebration party! It was just wonderful!!! Ahh! So the party lasted till about midnight and we all went home.

Phil and I got breakfast this morning. We wanted last night to be our celebration and celebration only so this morning we talked wedding logistics! We went to Cracker Barrel and talked about everything. We'd like to get married early in the summer so that we have 2-3 months of being married before school starts next fall, so that most of our friends will still be in town (because lots of people do internships, summer missions, etc.) and that way we'll have a free summer and not have to do "wedding stuff". Anyway, we looked at dates and so far thought that May 24th would be the best. We'd really like to save the date and start looking at places. (which will be either in KC or we thought about trying to find a sweet place along the river.)

Anyway, I just wanted to let you guys know! I can't even believe it! This is such an exciting thing!

LOVE!

Lace