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9 months ago
Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
What we've made convenient...
I was thinking yesterday about human suffering and also what it means to be human. They say that the greatest and worst experiences of our lives are what really shape us into who we really are. Sometimes those experiences come hand in hand. But when I was thinking about human suffering, probably us white, middle-class folks have it the best. Our suffering consists of dying grandparents or the weight of finals week. This might sound a little heartless, but even the worst of our suffering (an alcoholic parent, physical or sexual abuse, etc.), doesn't seem to compare in my eyes with the suffering of the third world.
Conveniently, we have defined (WE as in the Western, developed world) human and what "real life" is to traveling, education, having people skills, and an occasional spiritual experience. If we can speak, if we are literate, if we have seen other parts of the world, if we have incurred on some magical "other" existence, if we have been to college, if we "know our stuff", then, and only then are we truly human. Right???
Well, I'm not thinking that's particularly true... And worst of all, it devalues the worth of the majority of all the other human beings on this beautiful planet. What if everything we thought was true was completely wrong? Like what if we have placed education on a pedestal so high that we are completely blind to "real life", that is if real life was only seen by the eyes of the suffering. We conveniently assume that if "they" don't have running water, or if they have AIDS, or if they've never been to school that they are less than human. When the reality is that in all the time we've spent going to the lake and playing scrabble, these people have been searching for food and praying for clean water.
I have never experienced the death of a parent, the lack of a parent, starvation, disease, genocide, ethnic cleansing, lack of education, homelessness, etc... I mean the list could go on and on. But I guarantee that if I had experienced any of those terrible things, I would have a much different picture of the world and what true life really is.
I don't know. All I'm saying is that we've made a very convenient definition of life and what it means to be human, that all we've done is spit in the faces of those whose lives look nothing like ours.
It's at least something to ponder...
Lacy
Conveniently, we have defined (WE as in the Western, developed world) human and what "real life" is to traveling, education, having people skills, and an occasional spiritual experience. If we can speak, if we are literate, if we have seen other parts of the world, if we have incurred on some magical "other" existence, if we have been to college, if we "know our stuff", then, and only then are we truly human. Right???
Well, I'm not thinking that's particularly true... And worst of all, it devalues the worth of the majority of all the other human beings on this beautiful planet. What if everything we thought was true was completely wrong? Like what if we have placed education on a pedestal so high that we are completely blind to "real life", that is if real life was only seen by the eyes of the suffering. We conveniently assume that if "they" don't have running water, or if they have AIDS, or if they've never been to school that they are less than human. When the reality is that in all the time we've spent going to the lake and playing scrabble, these people have been searching for food and praying for clean water.
I have never experienced the death of a parent, the lack of a parent, starvation, disease, genocide, ethnic cleansing, lack of education, homelessness, etc... I mean the list could go on and on. But I guarantee that if I had experienced any of those terrible things, I would have a much different picture of the world and what true life really is.
I don't know. All I'm saying is that we've made a very convenient definition of life and what it means to be human, that all we've done is spit in the faces of those whose lives look nothing like ours.
It's at least something to ponder...
Lacy
Sunday, June 29, 2008
The Good Life
Lots of people ask me "how's married life?", "how's it feel to be married?", "how are the newlyweds?"... Lots of people have asked me if I feel like a new or different person. Lots of people have asked me to pinpoint the biggest difference. First off, married life is great. I highly recommend it! I get to live with my best friend (sorry Erica), and there is nothing better than that! However, besides the few OBVIOUS differences, here are some things I've learned and encountered as a newlywed wife.
1.) For the first time in my life I am poor. This may sounds depressing, but it is teaching us a lot. We live in a tiny place. We have no air conditioning. We shop at Aldi's. We go to the laundromat. We play ladder golf instead of going to the movies. I'm sincerely glad we opted out of waiting till we had money to get married.
2.) Love and laughter really are food for the soul. There has not been a single day that has gone by that I haven't loved fully or laughed hard. When you live with someone as funny as Phil, it's hard not to crack up on a frequent basis. But, as one of my new favorite songs goes... "we got our love", and that is what will keep us alive.
3.) The "role" of a wife isn't so bad. I'm serious. I actually like to cook dinner every night. I like to make the house look nice for when Phil gets home from work. I like having to ask Phil to clean the toilet. :) I didn't know about the "role" and if it would fit me or not. Turns out, I'm quite the housewife, especially in my cute floweredy lime-green apron!
4.) Marriage makes you vulnerable. Living with someone 24/7, especially in the way of a spouse, you get a little exposed. Phil sees all my faults. He sees where I'm lazy, what I eat, what I do when no one's looking, how much time I spend with the Lord, etc. And when I'm upset or quiet or sad or whatever, I can't just keep it in. I have to tell him what's up. It's good for a marriage to be vulnerable. Really good.
5.) Sex is only a tiny part of the "becoming one". Becoming one is so much more! How he hangs his towels, where we leave our shoes, the way he likes to make cinnamon toast, how I like the pillows arranged, where we want to go for dinner.... I could go on and on, but I think you get the point. Up until about a month ago, Phil and I did a lot of things in completely different ways. But now that we're married, we see those differences and we find a sweet little middle where the oneness is created! It's beautiful. That's why in a few years from now, we'll have similar sayings, manerisms, heck - we'll probably even start to look alike!
So there ya go... A few things I have learned in the past month!
--Lace
1.) For the first time in my life I am poor. This may sounds depressing, but it is teaching us a lot. We live in a tiny place. We have no air conditioning. We shop at Aldi's. We go to the laundromat. We play ladder golf instead of going to the movies. I'm sincerely glad we opted out of waiting till we had money to get married.
2.) Love and laughter really are food for the soul. There has not been a single day that has gone by that I haven't loved fully or laughed hard. When you live with someone as funny as Phil, it's hard not to crack up on a frequent basis. But, as one of my new favorite songs goes... "we got our love", and that is what will keep us alive.
3.) The "role" of a wife isn't so bad. I'm serious. I actually like to cook dinner every night. I like to make the house look nice for when Phil gets home from work. I like having to ask Phil to clean the toilet. :) I didn't know about the "role" and if it would fit me or not. Turns out, I'm quite the housewife, especially in my cute floweredy lime-green apron!
4.) Marriage makes you vulnerable. Living with someone 24/7, especially in the way of a spouse, you get a little exposed. Phil sees all my faults. He sees where I'm lazy, what I eat, what I do when no one's looking, how much time I spend with the Lord, etc. And when I'm upset or quiet or sad or whatever, I can't just keep it in. I have to tell him what's up. It's good for a marriage to be vulnerable. Really good.
5.) Sex is only a tiny part of the "becoming one". Becoming one is so much more! How he hangs his towels, where we leave our shoes, the way he likes to make cinnamon toast, how I like the pillows arranged, where we want to go for dinner.... I could go on and on, but I think you get the point. Up until about a month ago, Phil and I did a lot of things in completely different ways. But now that we're married, we see those differences and we find a sweet little middle where the oneness is created! It's beautiful. That's why in a few years from now, we'll have similar sayings, manerisms, heck - we'll probably even start to look alike!
So there ya go... A few things I have learned in the past month!
--Lace
Friday, June 27, 2008
Recent Trends: the GOOD and the BAD
Phil and I frequently talk about the "trends" we see in the world, often in our own community here in Columbia. Trends are really funny things, some good, some awful, some sad, and some that hopefully evolve into ways of life. Let's name a few...
1.) Organic Food. - I haven't decided what I think about it. Sure, it's great because of preservatives and pesticides and what not. I have not been a participant of this trend because of money. Organic food costs too much.
2.) Smoking Cigarettes. - BAD trend. At first it was cigars and the hookah, but now I've heard that the trend is to smoke real cigarettes. This is probably the most surprising fact I've heard lately, and the saddest. With all we know about smoking and how bad it is for our health, it's really stupid that so many people have started it lately.
3.) Going Green. - great trend! Sad that it's a "trend", but at least more people know about it and are becoming more exposed to ways we can help our environment. I have tried a little bit with going green, but again... It's more expensive.
4.) Hummus. - so glad I found this trend. Ha! I love hummus. But don't eat it just because it's "in". Eat it because it's freaking good.
5.) Being "All About" Something. I can't name specifics because it would hurt feelings. But when people are all about a coffee shop, or a book club, or a church, or a group, or whatever, it seems stupid and takes away from the passion you should find within that certain thing. For instance. Instead of being obsessed with a church, be wildly passionate about the Jesus you love. Instead of being obsessed with a certain group, be wildly passionate about your life's mission. Instead of being all about a coffee shop or a book club, be wildly passionate about the relationships and experiences you gain from those things.
6.) "Fake" Specialty Diets. - We've all seen them. The people who tackle a silly diet to be weird or different or whatever. Kudos to those of you (Rachy-Rach!) who have real reasons for your diet and who actually stick with it instead of bailing. There are good reasons to go on specialty diets. But there are really stupid reasons too...
7.) Blogging. - I'm so sad this is a trend, and not a lifestyle. I am a dedicated blogger, and have been since middle school (yes, xanga counts!) It makes me sad when people blog for a few months and then stop. I love the blogging community. Reading ideas, thoughts, learning new music, stuff like that.
8.) American Apparel. - Sorry if this offends you. I just don't buy it. People aren't wearing these clothes for the better cause of AA, (it's a sweatshop free company in case you didn't know). The majority of the "fashion world" wears AA just because it's in. In most cases, (magazine ads, even the AA store on the plaza in KC) I have seen an American Apparel shirt with a $400 pair of jeans. Just doesn't make much sense.
9.) Christian Lingo. - I hate it. "pursue", "intentional", "exclusive relationship", "do life with". I know, I know.... I've said these words and phrases many times. But I feel like they have less meaning now. The words come out because they are the "things to say". I guess if they are meant, then they're not so bad. I just think they are overused.
10.) The Avoidance of the Word "Love". - Never was I a part of this trend. I've actually heard the phrase "we don't know how we feel, we can't trust our emotions" come out of someone's mouth. You can't say you love someone because you don't know what love is. You can't say I love you because if you break up, then your heart will ache worse than if you avoided saying it. Right??? Nope, wrong. If you love someone, you better tell them. And you won't question it when you do, you'll know right away that it's love. No matter what others are telling you. If Jesus, the guy we're all following, is all about love, then maybe we should be too.
I hope that these 10 little comments didn't hurt or offend anyone. That wasn't my intent. Just some things to think about. Especially you smokers! Stop that!!!
Adios,
Lace
1.) Organic Food. - I haven't decided what I think about it. Sure, it's great because of preservatives and pesticides and what not. I have not been a participant of this trend because of money. Organic food costs too much.
2.) Smoking Cigarettes. - BAD trend. At first it was cigars and the hookah, but now I've heard that the trend is to smoke real cigarettes. This is probably the most surprising fact I've heard lately, and the saddest. With all we know about smoking and how bad it is for our health, it's really stupid that so many people have started it lately.
3.) Going Green. - great trend! Sad that it's a "trend", but at least more people know about it and are becoming more exposed to ways we can help our environment. I have tried a little bit with going green, but again... It's more expensive.
4.) Hummus. - so glad I found this trend. Ha! I love hummus. But don't eat it just because it's "in". Eat it because it's freaking good.
5.) Being "All About" Something. I can't name specifics because it would hurt feelings. But when people are all about a coffee shop, or a book club, or a church, or a group, or whatever, it seems stupid and takes away from the passion you should find within that certain thing. For instance. Instead of being obsessed with a church, be wildly passionate about the Jesus you love. Instead of being obsessed with a certain group, be wildly passionate about your life's mission. Instead of being all about a coffee shop or a book club, be wildly passionate about the relationships and experiences you gain from those things.
6.) "Fake" Specialty Diets. - We've all seen them. The people who tackle a silly diet to be weird or different or whatever. Kudos to those of you (Rachy-Rach!) who have real reasons for your diet and who actually stick with it instead of bailing. There are good reasons to go on specialty diets. But there are really stupid reasons too...
7.) Blogging. - I'm so sad this is a trend, and not a lifestyle. I am a dedicated blogger, and have been since middle school (yes, xanga counts!) It makes me sad when people blog for a few months and then stop. I love the blogging community. Reading ideas, thoughts, learning new music, stuff like that.
8.) American Apparel. - Sorry if this offends you. I just don't buy it. People aren't wearing these clothes for the better cause of AA, (it's a sweatshop free company in case you didn't know). The majority of the "fashion world" wears AA just because it's in. In most cases, (magazine ads, even the AA store on the plaza in KC) I have seen an American Apparel shirt with a $400 pair of jeans. Just doesn't make much sense.
9.) Christian Lingo. - I hate it. "pursue", "intentional", "exclusive relationship", "do life with". I know, I know.... I've said these words and phrases many times. But I feel like they have less meaning now. The words come out because they are the "things to say". I guess if they are meant, then they're not so bad. I just think they are overused.
10.) The Avoidance of the Word "Love". - Never was I a part of this trend. I've actually heard the phrase "we don't know how we feel, we can't trust our emotions" come out of someone's mouth. You can't say you love someone because you don't know what love is. You can't say I love you because if you break up, then your heart will ache worse than if you avoided saying it. Right??? Nope, wrong. If you love someone, you better tell them. And you won't question it when you do, you'll know right away that it's love. No matter what others are telling you. If Jesus, the guy we're all following, is all about love, then maybe we should be too.
I hope that these 10 little comments didn't hurt or offend anyone. That wasn't my intent. Just some things to think about. Especially you smokers! Stop that!!!
Adios,
Lace
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
dream jobs that probably wouldn't require a college degree...
Often I have little dreams of things I could see myself doing. And lately, they have been pounding away at my mind. Most of them just sound like the most perfect job, something that would be fun and different everyday, yet none of them would require a college degree. Here's a small list, (in no specific order, of course):
1. Cupcake Bar - I'd love to start one of these in Columbia. I went to my first last weekend in STL. We'd have a cute name like "the sweetest thing" or something like that, and sell only cupcakes. Big ones, small ones, fruity ones, chocolate ones, maybe even a few VEGAN ones!
2. Wedding Anything - the more and more I think about my wedding day and how much I loved it, I think about planning weddings for others, or working at a gown shop or something. I think it would be a blast to help other girls plan their big day! And, I could show them how to have a gorgeous wedding with a small budget!
3. Cutting Hair - I know, I know, you're probably thinking this job doesn't sound glamourous at all. But I really do think it would be a fun job.
4. Florist - how fun would it be to put beautiful bouquets of flowers together all day? It would constantly smell good and you could always be creative!
(Yes, these are pictures of flowers from my wedding!)Those are just a few....
Maybe I could do some of these part-time while I have kids, or in the summer when I'm a teacher... I dunno.
-Lace
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
Why I've got to be dedicated to loving on youth...
Have you heard this new song? Phil and I heard it for the first time while we were honeymooning. At first I thought it was Lindsey Lohan after her big lesbian kick, turns out, it's another singer by the name of Katy Perry. Here are the astonishing lyrics. I added the italics to emphasize how heartbreaking this is.
This was never the way I planned
Not my intention
I got so brave, drink in hand
Lost my discretion
It's not what, I'm used to
Just wanna try you on
I'm curious for you
Caught my attention
I kissed a girl and I liked it
The taste of her cherry chap stick
I kissed a girl just to try it
I hope my boyfriend don't mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Don't mean I'm in love tonight
I kissed a girl and I liked it
I liked it
No, I don't even know your name
It doesn't matter
You're my experimental game
Just human nature
It's not what, good girls do
Not how they should behave
My head gets so confused
Hard to obey
Us girls we are so magical
Soft skin, red lips, so kissable
Hard to resist so touchable
Too good to deny it
Ain't no big deal, it's innocent
This was never the way I planned
Not my intention
I got so brave, drink in hand
Lost my discretion
It's not what, I'm used to
Just wanna try you on
I'm curious for you
Caught my attention
I kissed a girl and I liked it
The taste of her cherry chap stick
I kissed a girl just to try it
I hope my boyfriend don't mind it
It felt so wrong
It felt so right
Don't mean I'm in love tonight
I kissed a girl and I liked it
I liked it
No, I don't even know your name
It doesn't matter
You're my experimental game
Just human nature
It's not what, good girls do
Not how they should behave
My head gets so confused
Hard to obey
Us girls we are so magical
Soft skin, red lips, so kissable
Hard to resist so touchable
Too good to deny it
Ain't no big deal, it's innocent
This song breaks my heart. How many 13-18 year-old girls are going to hear this and think it's okay to do this? It's innocent. It's just human nature. It's ok, try it out.
Watch the video:
-Lacy
Friday, May 23, 2008
Throw Up
This morning, all I could think about was the wedding. I got so excited I literally thought I was going to throw up!
One week from today!!!
Lacy Donaldson
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